Archive for the ‘wat i ve seen!!!’ Category

FEELING OF A LIFETIME!

Posted: December 16, 2010 in wat i ve seen!!!

My friends always ask why each of my posts related or referenced to Bollywood or movies..but coming from land of Amitabh bachchans and SRKs and Rajnis..its definitely fair for me to do that..after all that’s exactly how we see life in India..live that life..relate things happening in life..express our feelings way some actor would have done it…from posing like the DCH trio to the biking  stunts of Devgan movies we always love living the short life of being someone”else”.Dont know why..blame it on my inheritance or just environment I grew in..the incidents which I could connect with movies I always did my best with them…be it mouthing the words or throwing actions at hitherto..i just loved expressing  myself like “REEL LIFE” characters..TODAY too I feel like the same..yeah yeah..first try connecting the following…Salman s character in second half of maine pyaar kiya…Anil Kapoor s in Ram Lakhan..Shashi Kapoor in Deewar one scene which is common in all  these movies..come on!!!! for the “new movie” crowd I give  another cue…Ranbir in Wake Up Sid..Got it? Or still not??

Well today wat makes me happy and wat makes me scream out this mail,  is the joy which individuals in the above movies blended themselves in..Call it the first salary or in the filmy terms “Mere mehnet ki pehli Kamai”..doesn it feel truly satisfying when u know that u ve achieved something materialistic ; but above everything  this materialistic thing is something that somehow defines ur success in this petty imperialistic world…I know it’s not the figure of the “kamai” that runs in our mind..but the very sense of achievement which makes us happy!!I still remember when I watched Maine Pyaar Kiya on Television playing the video cassette on the VCR(those days Cassettes were a major craze!!)The scene where in Salman returns after a tiresome truck ride fighting the goons and collects his first salary which is peanuts compared to his father s wealth..what gets him moving is the feeling that I have learnt something today..that earning my own food is the most realistic success in life…The transition of this very scene in movies is again worth observing..70’s and 80’ s movies had Police Officer as their premier job which the hero achieves after going lots of pain and humiliation..but then came Wake Up Sid…a cool and unnerved Ranbir walks out of house only to accidently think of a job of photographer for a magazine and later achieving success in it..There goes the transition from a police officer who fights the vengeful thugs to a photographer who lives and lets live…And yay the scene where he leaves his father moist eyed is when he places his first salary and says he s learnt to live finally!

From a long time I always used to ask my cousin s and sibling how it feels to an “OWN” bank account with “OWN” money in it..They replied talking about the security and future jazz..but I feel theres more to it..which a human cant express even by most uncommonly humane expressions..Because just like the first cycle ride…first touch of friendship…first cry of joy..FIRST SALARY is something which has its own meaning and importance..When I asked my frenz what they plan to do with their first salary,  all of them had plans..even I have my own..what joins us all together is the feeling that will run in our heart tonite; before going to sleep ”today I got my first salary!!”

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Just a li’l Feeling

Posted: November 19, 2010 in wat i ve seen!!!

When I stepped into my college yesterday after a period of 4 months i was more or less looking at finishing my work and viewing a cultural extravaganza and then heading back home.I did not know that this journey would take me so deep down the lane that it would give me a tinge of self actualization. As I stepped into the entrance of the front foyer my ears were filled by the same hustle which I have been feeling from past 4 years.The colourful brouchures were still stuck on the notice board which I used read every day to check what new opportunity it had in store for me.I continued walking towards my department in a newly constructed link which led me to my department.Every step I took made me rewind and think..”I was here once…I stood there chatting with my frenz…I fulfilled my debating pleasures there for 3 long years”.Then I saw the people around me..which ever place I went..was happy to get a smile from them..Specially the librarian under whose watchful eyes I studied during exams..who used to caution me about of cell phones in the library.He told me he often misses seeing me in the corner of the library fidgeting with the photocopied text books and staying in the library till he finally shut the door at 10:50 night.Then I started moving towards my department to meet my teachers there.They all warm heartedly asked me about how my life in the corporate world was going.Then came something which I was excited the most about.For quite sometime I had never witnessed a function purely as a spectator in my department.Some or the other way I would be associated with it, knowing the whole plot before.

 

The moment I entered the hall where the function was being conducted it took me back to the first time this cultural extravaganza was conducted on a large scale in the department in this very hall.I remember quite a bit of struggle convincing the content and quality was upto the mark so that it could be showcased to the audience of different age groups and ideals.I remember the long sessions I had with my team in discussing what take away will every group of audience have.There  was a conscious effort to transform it into an experience from a  program for the audience.I remember being the host of the event, making sure all the nitty grittys of the event was sealed perfectly.Before writing this blog I remember look at all the photos of the event.It was absolutely fabulous.

 

As the event began I could see my own team in the current organizing committe members faces.The person in-charge of the food coupons..the person who was managing the logistics..the hosts juggling with last minute changes in the program.As it continued I could see the energy, enthusiasm and the freshness brought into the organization by the current committee.They carefully had planned out every single details of the event from seating arrangement to the discipline management.The whole program with its diverse nature conquered many hearts.From the gracious kathak sequence Kahe  ched from Devdas to the solo Mike Jackson performance, it truly was high on its standard.The unique prayer number Ek tu hi Bharosa was quite a fresh whiff breaking the trend from religious rendering which I never favoured.The indo-western dance sequence of songs Chalka re and other foot tapping numbers was absolutely brilliantly choreographed.Another noteworthy mention was the dance sequence of south cult-punjabi mix which was told to me was performed with minimal practice.One thing I felt about the song sequences was that with minimal music the songs could be much more soothing, this is because of the not so-good acoustics the hall has.And moreover the our beloved principal speaking about the formation of the whole student organization truly made the recap all improvisations organization had undergone in the years I was a part of it.The band as usual was brilliant with its performance.On the whole the show was an amazing experience for me as a spectator who had come expecting nothing short of what I saw.I would like to say that what the organizers showed us is the all that’s needed to make a show successful is integrated effort from the whole team keeping all personal hassles at bay.

 

When I left the college to get back home I often kept thinking how this attachment with my college, department has grown even stronger after I have graduated.I still keep searching for myself sometimes.May be I am still there…in the seminar halls…on the LHC stairs…benches near the department..corridors.. the front foyer..or may be in the old  canteen which I don’t see now…

 

Ashwath



I remember it was a Thursday evening and it was quite a dull day or may be i felt it was dull because whole day i was busy bidding good-bye to my relatives in my home town Belgaum.For a person who has stayed in a place for 18 years the bonding is pretty a strong one.Although my decision of pursuing an engineering course shook many of my relatives and family friends; the choice of choosing MS Ramaiah Institute of Technology Bangalore was also an equally a shocker of a news from a guy who s father who is the chairman of a 30 bed hospital in the city.But somehow it was quite a digestible one because my non medical inclinations were very much evident.

I reached Bangalore the next day and waited 2 more days for my Mom to come over to help me get settled in the hostel.And thus begun my journey which i never knew would change my life so much and mould me into a person which i am today writing this blog entry.Certainly from my thinking to the rationality of my decisions everything has undergone massive evolution and changes.Atleast for the past one year i was living a dream of a lifetime in this college.From being a part of team which won the VTU Annual fest to visiting Oxford UK for a debate and not to forget the first time i tried behaving like an engineer by carrying a project under Mam.Time just flew off doing various activities like tech fests..organizing department events and moreover being with friends.

About 15 days ago i heard Mam telling me that she wanted to meet the current department students committee to plan events for this semester; and among those events she mentioned our FAREWELL.At first i didn think much about it; but suddenly i went through a time which i feel is the worst of my fears in my lifetime.That evening as i was returning from college to my room i happen to stay in the empty college canteen for sometime.I sat there for about an hour glimpsing at a flash back of  my college life.First time i got my sem results…first batch trip with friends..time when i failed for the first time in my exams..when i felt lost in crowd..the whole new family i got here in form of my hostel…when i got my first job!Most of all a thought came in which happen to kill all the processes present in my brain.What next in life? Here in college i had a lifestyle..i knew people here..i had a guide who used to help me take steps..friends who used to be around when i needed them..i could live a life which i had dreamt of while coming to Bangalore.And soon all of this was going to end soon.I could no longer have those lazy chats in classes with olive,poo,dhar and ani…no ultra active debates with my debsoc…no more organizing department events which i loved so much…moreover no college life which my body and mind had got so used to and just couldn think anything like coming out of it.I still remember that night i neither could have my dinner nor sleep well and slowly i started sinking in the greatest fear of my life.I began thinking about it almost everytime  i was idle and thanks to just 3 days of class it just builded up.With me imprisoned in deep thoughts of this fear frustration crept in and my insecurities just crawled into my life.Dont know my replies and attitude towards everything in life changed.Soon the questions also increased..How would be my job? Would my boss treat me same way as my guide here? would i ever get a chance to do things that i loved..organize..debate..public speak.friends..win…in short live the dream which i was doing till now!!Whole of this continued for a week or two..i just couldn do anything nor did i know why was i so irritated in life..i would plant myself in front of the comp and watch movies at a stretch..or just shut my eyes and sleep away to glory unaware of the world around.But slowly i guess this fear is vanishing because i certainly am seeing my relations around getting affected due to this behavior.Even now as i write this blog; not that i have grown out of that fear but still i am trying to live every moment of my life here and do all the things which i loved doing here..I know it shows me getting emotionally drained  here..but still this fear which i have seen in past some days in my life i hope will help me grow a lot stronger and humane in my life..

Love you friends..Love you MSRIT…Love you Life!

Hoping against a bad hope-

Aashu!

well it was between my exams durin my 4th semester i started bloggin..reason–had failed to get anger..frustration or jus let my voice flow out in best possible way..so started writing…and yaeh it had its moments…i almost bcame an avid blogger..writin frequently..i wrote about my old diary excerpts…my wriiten short stories…experiences of life..successes..failures..and then suddenly somehow was a small hiberantion..Blame my college activities for this..infact this sem was FILLED UPTO NECK for me..slog for a month for our Dept Tech Fest..me being the Co-ordinater had an extra bit of effort to pump in..Again i hate my over enthusiatic affection towards such activities..i did get drained out but had no option..April 17th finished the fest then came in The National Level debate in my college which i was the conevener..for 3 days of the event run all the way and yeah also judge some of the best debates of the life..then done with this on april 27th next came our Internal Assessments!!!the very next day..cant believe way i wrote and managed to score..but was HAPPY doin all this..could work ..enjoy at my pace..my style…so i guess never blogged..coz no frustration..no anger!!

But as English poetry emphasizes on Blow Blow Thou winter wind.Thou art not so Unkind!!i believe times had to change..somethin somewhere had to happen which bring me face to face with one of the greatest personifications Life could get..”LIFE IS NOT A BED OF ROSES”..seems trivial..but hits the nail rite on the coffin!!!when things suddenly aren in your hands..when u struggle to get things rite..But somewhere luck eludes u..mockin at ur attempt makin it seem too foolish and meaningless..thats when a pain creeps in and disturbs you from within..the laughter on face n sparks of happyness are only participative not a part of u…not that i haven felt these things before..but this time i feel its not the normal scare or fear..yaa and again its the reason i m bloggin today..its my anger..my frustration..which i need to spit out..and i know this venom which m lettin out mite harm my relationships..so i feel its the best for me and for the wonderful pple around me..

My mom says–a person always gives his best when he s heart pounds the most..yearns the most..wat man doesn know he ll be rewarded somehow someway..but yeah he will..only thing he can do is survive these times and hold the threads of relations with love n care..and see them grow to be your greatest support..

i second ur thought mom!!!as always!!!

hopin to be soon happy_angry frustrated son of urs!!

ashwath……

well my bloggin had almost got a semi-colon b4 i realized i need to get back to wat i enjoyed the most about 2 months ago…and here m back again..perhaps reason m bloggin..same reason why i started off bloggin..to say somethin i always wanted to but couldn..or said it but none understood close to wat i felt..

well was goin thru an amazin period of life..our college winnin the VTU fest for the first time..m walkin the fashion ramp..showin my exploits in biz events..in short;life at its best…then came in The Christ Parliamentary Debate on feb 28 n march 1…Christ Coll s been quite a hunting ground for me so i really hoped i could make most out of this tournament..Infact i did get an amazin team also..consistin of Aniket(whom i always wanted in my team as i knew both of  us could rip teams apart) and Upasana(finest speakers to come into our debsoc this season)…so here we wre as MSRIT A team to compete in the debates…

Well first debate was quite a run-up with us MSR Law team with unanimous win…then came in one of my fav debates in my debatin career..against National Law School of India University..the institute which produces all asian champion debaters..Being opposition we did an awesome job hopin tat brand name NLSIU could be beaten at last..and yes we did beat NLSIU..Man..if i ever felt so satisfied in my debatin life..it was this moment..We then had another one debate which we won comfortably and yes i was in first Semi-Final of my life..Felt great to go into the tourney as not exactly a winnin team n do this well…Semi finals was with one of our coll teams itself..which we manage to beat comfortably…then came in the moments which i had waited all through my life…

i remember walkin thru the corridors of christ coll at 7 in evenin thinkin wat will happen in the FINALS  of the debate..i remember watchin cricketeers warmin up b4 the finals of a world cup match and hear to preview of the match..felt the same adreline rush in my body..couldn jus believe wat was happenin arnd me..had my entire debsoc there for me cheerin and wantin to win first ever debate championship for the coll…and i too hoped for the same..tat winnin against arch-rivals RVCE would be great..wat i was scared is wat if i lost the debate..and i wasn wrong…

after a group hug we entered the debate room…after the prep time the debate began with our team in the opposition..i must say all three of us gave best speeches of our life on a skewed line of thought proposed by the other team..sply aniket who went in as the first speaker from our side managed to do a gem of a job..never saw him so aggressive in debate b4..he was on fire..after the debate was overwe all waited for the verdict..though we knew we had given our best shot..still somewhere i believed a win or loss mattered to me.. a lot!!!

result was out and we had lost the debate..though at tat moment i thought it was just another debate to lose didn know wat it wud to me..tat nite i remember goin thru the whole debate..even in my dreams i had same lines of wat i spoke echoed..the next day was also in a sullen mood..not knowin wat to do ..kept thinkin wat more could i ve done to win the debate…found plenty of things but of no use..couldn repair wat had happen…left me restless..this has still continued..even now whenever i m idle..i go into tat debate..still remember word to word wat happen in tat debate..wat the other team said..wat we replied..its still fresh wat i saw..the losing moments and RVCE rejoicing their way thru…all of it wat i call a perfect nightmare…dont know how long it will trouble me..hope i get my same team and go again to christ next year and win the tournament to bury the ghosts of 1st march 2009..till then i need to wait..and try treatin worst nightmare of my life!!!

ashwath

As i quote here the verbatim meaning of marriage from the oxford dictionary which states tat its association of two pple coming together making an alliance to stay together..but as i mention in the very topic of my post as Family wedding..hence i stick to this defn of mine sayin that marriage is not only as alliance of two individuals but also a culmination of two family s in themselves..i guess by now u must have interpreted the rest of the word s meaning..i.e Big is obvious the magnitude of relationships involved..Fat is the proportion of this celebration called marriage..and yes above all the fulcrum of my whole defn of this post..INDIAN!!!

this is been a post which mainly involves my view of wat marriages mean to me(trust me;m still not a grad)..sply in our community every event or action carried out by the bride or groom s side has an articulate meanin..be it performin of pooja s at home which mainly signifies the beginin of a good func at home or the invitin of guests..

next wat i ve loved the most in all our family marriages is the evenin b4 marriage..the dance..the hulla..the masti..i still remember dancin at all my cousin s weddin..my atrocious yet cult dancin made sure pple still sometimes stare at me not only on the street where i danced but also the band members of who played the music..here i d sply like to mention the typical tunes played by petty yet large heated bands of belgaum which are truly amazin..moreover they are so infectious tat once when me and cousin had actually been to book the band we did do a jig at a stranger s marriage procession..and yes the crowd too jeered there..one of the most memorable incis i remember is durin my sister s marriage…the 1/2 a km procession path actually took abt 1 1/2 hrs to be completed with the groom s side too being entusiastic pple..we also made the dulha do a bit of leg shakin..later it was also the turn of bride s and groom s parents to chain up and dance!!trust me t was great fun…and yes add to the infamous naagin dance between me and my cousin!!!

next comes wat i can say is the most imp func acc to me..time of introduction of relatives of  both sides..in our language we call it edurigolluvudu..its a formal way in which the counterparts are introduced to each other..why i feel this is imp is that.when we talk abt somethin like a marriage..there the relation is not only knit between two pple but also the whole set of pple associated between two pple..for a new relation to begin theres always a need for ice breakin session which indeed is this program..i too ve been a part of this many times and yes it has made me realize tat the world is indeed small..

next comes on the ceremony of formally invitin the groom for the marriage..where the bride s side ask the groom and his parents to come over for the func..i ve always been a part of discussions(mostly with gals of my age in my family)as why is it so that bride s parents are involved in playin the bent fiddle roles..this is exactly wat i refute..when u are talkin abt marryin off ur daughter(the integral part of ur family) u need to see that u show it to the groom s side tat we love our gal..u too better love her the same way in our house..this is why their love is transformed into so much enthusiasm durin the course of marriage..this i believe signifies that no side is ever at the receivin end..and sply in todays wat i can say educated world its always the balancin act..

the next of the act durin the marriage is pretty synonymous in all communities where both lead stars give their consent and begin the journey of lifetime..here too wat i believe is the most significant part is that they give in their consent in presence of well wishers n frenz..meanin tomo u refute of the decision..u make a fool of yourself..moreover it brings in a sense of responsibilty of both of em to chalk the road ahead..

now comes the session which i shall hate throughout my life..i still the tears rollin down and throat bulgin when my eldest cousin got married(i was in 7th) to the way i hid in my mom s pallu durin my sister s time of leavin after marriage..tat moment there s a flashback of all events come in front of ur eyes tat u ve shared with em..it may be the when u laughed ur guts out for the silliest of jokes to the times u simply fought with em over a trivial issue..all those petty incidents go on connectin till u realize..she s finally leavin my house!!!i still remember the way i glance thru all my snaps with my sis on the nite after her weddin..

on the contrary when as a family we wre returnin bac from my bro-cousin s marriage there wre glimpses as how the marriage went and  chats and antakshari sessions rite thru the train journey with numerous digs at pple arnd..also there was this feelin of how to talk to the new member in the family..tat feelin melts down slowly however..

this post of mine can be called my micro-scopic view of wat a marriage is..but still this is wat i ve seen and percieved..but frankly speakin the big indian fat weddings are still incomplete without FAMILY..

angers me!! certainly….

Posted: January 23, 2009 in wat i ve seen!!!

i usually blog when either m very frustrated or i m moved by somethin which i witness..well wat m witnessin now is belgaum legislation session at JNMC audi with speaker askin members to occupy their seats and so called members screamin their guts out after a good round of hoggin at delicious cuisine and sound sleep at the air conditioned hall…but by wat i m frustrated is the way 26/11 convict  Ajmal Amir kasab s case is bein handled..not tat m a staunch non-believer of human rights for criminals but i feel its too bad for the judiciary to keep failin consistantly..its been happenin again and again..i still remember when indian judiciary in order to prove itself just and equal has displayed its non-functionality at various levels..let me begin..

after the mumbai blasts when the police gathered proof against D company chief..menon family and many hard core hand in glove people..wat did the judiciary do..it declared tat every person has a right to fight untill proven guilty..i agree to it..but if such proofs are available why do u want to give them the slightest of chance to escape..wats the use of police probin and collectin proofs when they only have to see the arrested pple stay in hi-fi jails temporarily or keep avoidin the judgements by shiftin ahead of the dates..wat remains in the end is an easy to  make or break system which can be manipulated carelessly..the same thing happen tat time also..our chief justice declared anyone to could fight dawood ibrahim s case..then arose or country s so called best lawyer and now politician Ram Jethmalani who was fightin D s case..jus think of the situation..u have the best lawyer of the nation on the opp side..i don feel its wrong to call it an assault on our democracy considerin the delayed judgements already in favour of guilty and accused..our premier lawyer rolled his best dice to ensure tat D company was intact fillin his bank account and partyin at henchmens farm houses in nation and abroad..i wud like to ask why was it necessary to give such a kind of let off to a person whom everyone knew was guilty..where was the bar association which strikes every fortnight for increase in hike to govt lawyers..why dint it stop mr.malani from takin dawood s case..why did mr.malani think tat his profession comes b4 the security of the nation..its coz of tat failure we can attribute many of underworld and terrorists funds still active at our neighbours house(pakistan)..

speakin of the current situation..wats happenin now..the person arrested RED-HANDED..one of thosewho killed our officers like hemant karkare..major unnikrishnan..still languishin in best available GUEST HOUSES of our nation..reason–our judiciary which says..his not been proven guilty..so he s our guest from neighbourin nation..and again CJI declares he can hire a lawyer to fight..has the CJI forgotten the loss of lives in india..the uproar it caused in minds and hearts of every indian..the march protests at gateway of india which the media gleefully highlighted..so tat terrorist can walk back to his land lke a hero or keep his trial pendin as in the case of ansari(the parliament attack convict)..is this the reason why we muct be proud of the judiciary..proud of democracy..i certainly don think so..wat it ll infact lead to is acts of extremism by our very own pple who want answers from politicians..courts..judges and yes  more whom they call FELLOW-INDIANS…..